The Sarcastic Blonde

wishlist wednesday: red, white, and blue

July 3, 2013

blue maxi // wedges // skirt // shorts // bikini // striped dress // white maxi // tb tote

The blue cut-out maxi looks just like the Rachel Pally, but for a fraction of the price at only $79.
And the white maxi also comes in black and pink, and looks like a dress to live in for the rest of summer and into fall.

We are off to Michigan for the rest of the week/weekend.

I can’t wait to be completely cut off from all technology, and where the most difficult thing that I’ll have to do for 4 days is climb these stairs 🙂 rough life.

What are you all up to for the holiday?
Hope you have a wonderful 4th of July!

xoxo

Lifestyle

a smorgasbord of steals, and sweets.

July 2, 2013

With such a strange week with the holiday coming up,

I thought I would just put together a bunch of random things.

A smorgasbord if you will, because who doesn’t love that word?

I wear mostly gold jewelry, and have always loved the cartier love bracelet. But no way in hell was that ever going to happen. I came across this guy for FIFTEEN DOLLARS on amazon.

{bracelet}

she just fits right in on my wrist.

BOOM. take that, rich bitches.

isn’t she prrtrty? they have a ton of other imitation things too, like the hermes H bracelets and buckle bracelets, david yurman, van cleef and arpels, and those cross necklaces.

We head up to the cottage tomorrow for a long weekend in Michigan and I can’t wait. It’s back to basics there – in the most amazing way. No cell/internet service, no washer/dryer or dishwasher, no television. Never in my life am I so content hand washing every dish because looking out straight onto the lake is incredible. I am trying to figure out some semi-easy recipes to make because the space is tiny and kitchen utensils are limited.

fruit skewers would always work.

chocolate filled strawberries

grapesicles: frozen grapes on a skewer

these would erase the 97 beers and 20 hamburgers you’re bound to consume over 4 days at the lake

and I swear, if I had the kitchen space, I really would make this ombre cake.

It would turn out EXACTLY the same I’m sure…. you’ve all seen my incredible photos of the food I make. I’m a true professional.

With a cookie cutter, this could be a possibility

alright…. enough food porn.

My life goal for the remainder of the summer:

I don’t think I have ever hit July being this pale.

So my plan for the days at the lake including drinking beers in the sunshine, getting so tired from drinking said beers in the sun, falling asleep on the beach and baking in the sun for hours, then waking up for dinner and repeating the whole thing the next day.

and if the weather is pure crap like it was last year….

we dress up in one of the 9 million hats hanging on the wall,

and chase wine with tequila shots if you lose at Polish Balls.

Then, we hit golf balls into the lake and feel like badasses because it looks like it goes SO FAR when really it was probably the worst shot ever.

I can hear Tim Allen’s “Pure Michigan” radio ad voice now…..

xoxo

Lifestyle

4th of July Finds

June 30, 2013

xoxo

fashion, Lifestyle

friday randoms

June 28, 2013

Random thoughts for Friday…..

What I wish I was wearing today:

jeans // tank // bracelet // shoes

My friend has the white skinny jeans and I love them. Plus, they are under $100! Anything with a criss cross back is good with me, and that bracelet is just gorgeous.

Buzzfeed lists are always so spot-on. This “Things that look just like childhood” was another great one.

A few of my favorites:

The greatest show ever

I wish I still knew how to fold my notes into shapes like this

and these were amazing.

How did I just find out that Banana Republic and Issa are collaborating?

Here’s hoping they make a dress just like that one.

I seriously want this planner. The only thing that can make me giddier than a planner? Being able to buy a planner well before a new year has begun.

Piperlime is having some incredible sales – designer dresses being a big part! Get ’em before they’re gone! I have my eye on this Joie Lace Dress in three different colors, and this bold Tracy Reese, and this adorable Kate Spade.

I hope you all have a great weekend!

xoxo

coffee talk, Lifestyle

coffee talk

June 27, 2013

discuss amongst ya-selves…..

Thanks to suri’s burn book I realized this little tid bit:

You can spell The Worst with the letters from North West’s name.

Kim + Kanye released a bunch of different fake photos of the baby to friends to see who would leak it to the press.

Hey….how about you focus your thoughts on PARENTING rather than more press. And sell the photo to a magazine and give the money to charity… like a charity for the children who have to grow up with the product of two egomaniacs like you.

I’m sure you all have seen at least part of Paula Deen’s interview on The Today Show.
I’m preeeetty sure the words “I’m sorry” were definitely not even spoken?

She is a complete and utter moron, and who is her PR team? The whole world is watching and waiting for you to apologize and instead you pull a full on “woe is me” moment??
If you read regularly, you know I love the food network and have watched her shows for years…. but this really proves she is not my Ina.

AND, I cannot stand when people “cry” and not ONE tear is coming down. YOU AREN’T CRYING. They did say she cried really hard when the interview ended though. I can’t handle when people make the squinty face and the crying voice and act like they are crying. If there aren’t tears, you aren’t fooling anyone.

As if you needed another reason to love Channing Tatum.
He and his little co-star are so cute together, with a secret handshake.

Princesses of Long Island:
Ashlee’s (Midge’s) “fabulous” 30th birthday party was in a strip mall. Very red carpet just like she said.
As guests enter, there were men in tiny undies with crudités and hummus strapped around their waists.
Who was the first to dip into the underwear?

Shocker.
Chanel/Coco/Blah-Blah’s ex-boyfriend suddenly and completely randomly shows up outside her house to talk! But wait…. his car is already lit entirely with production lights??

Once again, come on Bravo. Your boring me. This whole scene was pointless.
Erica continues to prove she is definitely not the “hot” girl she was in high school. But thank God because this was the only entertaining part of the whole episode. She continues to get wasted while “harmlessly flirting” at the club with Babs and Jeff’s Beard, Amanda.

It’s totally harmless to talk about extra underwear in your purse, oral sex, and having birthday sleepovers with guys at clubs! Your boyfriend is crazy and annoying for having trust issues with you!
~~I’m sorry,~~ She is pure trash.
I can’t wait to see what she says about how she looks in every episode at this reunion.

I watched random bits and pieces of Don’t Be Tardy throughout the season, but caught the majority of the finale.

Maybe I’ve gone real soft, but I just love how much her and Kroy really do seem to love each other. She is 100% herself with him and he is nuts over her. I don’t think I have ever seen them argue once. And he is so good for her kids with being a father figure and disciplining them.
I bash on people so much during Coffee Talk, but with all the angry dysfunctional people (and couples especially) on TV, it’s nice to see.
we just don’t want to see too much of it. that’s no fun 🙂

Even for Miley, these outfits lately have been driving me insane.

When did dressing like a hooker become fashionable?

Martha Stewart on WWHL was incredible last night.

Spanking Andy and breaking bottles over his head. Too good.
and tonight….. CHER! I cannot wait.

Ew….. I just heard Kris Jenner (whilst typing this) is having her own talk show premiere in July. Gross.

Episode 1: How to not be a mother, and use your children to make money.

Big Brother is baaackkkkkk.

I realize that this is not on everyone’s Reality TV obsession list like it is with me, so if any of you DO watch Big Brother please let me know so I can comment with you about it 🙂 I just love it so so much.

xoxo

Lifestyle, wedding

Wedding Wednesday

June 26, 2013

To start today’s Wedding Wednesday, I wanted to share a statistic I heard yesterday!!
The marriage rate is the lowest it has been in 100 years.

womp womp.

by the way it’s official. I can’t have children.
that debbie downer was the best one ever. I can’t control myself when they start to laugh.
But this has nothing to do with weddings….

The “big” things have been finalized for our wedding.

Setting a date was much more complicated than I had realized. All of our top dates were either booked by the church or the reception venue, or coincided with other weddings, or were dates that wouldn’t work for other reasons. I figured since we had more than a year until the wedding, getting both places lined up for the same date would be a breeze – wrong. But, that being said, once this stressful date picking was done, the rest has been really easy so far.

We are getting married June 7, 2014 – so a little less than a year to go!

The wedding will be in Atlanta, Georgia where I am from and where my family still lives. We debated Chicago for a little while, but for many reasons decided against it. I have always thought I would get married back home, at our country club, so it seemed like the right choice.

The ceremony will be at the Cathedral of Christ the King.

{via}

I’m really excited about this because, as you may know, many churches aren’t very pretty on the inside or outside. This church is gorgeous.

The reception will take place at our country club, Cherokee Town Club, just down the road from the church in Buckhead.

{via}

My sister had her reception at the club as well, so it’s nice because my mom and I basically know exactly what to expect and I can copy a bunch of the things she did 🙂

Enough about me.
There’s been so many Hollywood Wedding’s that we need to comment:
Joanna Krupa finally got married.

and paid $30,000 for that hideous thing.

Holly Madison got engaged with a huge ring

but I can’t quite figure out what it is??
those are kind words for I hate it.

Nene Leakes got married in a very lavish affair, costing $2 million.

with 4 wedding dresses!

Curtis Stone + Lindsay Price got married and theirs looked very pretty

I really like her bouquet.

And just a tid-bit I liked and found interesting.
With Tamra Barney’s big wedding and upcoming Wedding-related Bravo Spinoff,
she wore 3 wedding dresses, but put all of the bridesmaids in David’s Bridal Vera Wang Gowns that are under $180!