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The Sarcastic Blonde

fashion, food, fitness + a dose of sarcastic gossip

fashion, Holiday, holiday gifts

:: The Sarcastic Blonde’s Favorite Things of Oprah’s Favorite Things ::

November 6, 2017

:: The Sarcastic Blonde’s Favorite Things of Oprah’s Favorite Things ::


You know the debate?  The debate that starts every year around this time? Questionining if it’s time to start celebrating the holidays? If It’s too soon?
Well…. there is one woman that can put an end to that question.
And that woman is Oprah.
And Oprah has released her Oprah’s Favorite Things for 2017.

So, let the Holidays commence!!!!
Or at least the shopping aspect!

….. can we please get the Oprah Show back on? Because this episode was THE BEST!

editors note : One thing on her list that I was going to include but then didn’t but then am like “Why have I been thinking about this so much??” 23 & Me. The advertising is really getting to me with the 23 & me. Everywhere I turn, I see or hear a commercial and now I’m like “I DO need to know where I came from!!!” reality : do I care???? 
I figured out why it has me grabbed : The “Getting to Knoooooooow you” song in the commercial.  It’s a killer.  I realize that I will be signing it all day long.  Whoever did that deserves a serious pay raise.  Well done.  Hashtag slow clap. 

anyways….. let’s start with the edible gifts first!
…. obviously….. 

:: FOOD :: 

:: Caroline’s Cakes :: 

Oprah Says : According to Gayle, Caroline’s Cakes is famous for its caramel cake, but one bite of the seven-layer coconut cake takes me right back to Sunday afternoons in Mississippi, with my grandmother in the kitchen cracking eggs and shaving fresh coconut.
TSB Says : Does this not look so insanely amazing?!
Something about a million thin layers of cake just looks so perfectly delicious.

:: Cheese Knife :: 

Oprah Says : Goodbye, cluttered cheese platter: Here are three knives in one. The sharp edge cuts cleanly through firm cheese, the pointy tip breaks an aged cheese into shards, and the entire blade spreads soft cheeses. I’d give this with a ripe wedge of something delicious.
TSB Says: Who doesn’t need a good cheese knife? And you only need one that does it all!

:: Truffle Salt :: 

Oprah Says : I took the truffle and rosemary sea salt out of my bag at a restaurant, and the waiter asked, “You travel with that?” I said, “Do you have it here?” It wouldn’t be Favorite Things without truffles!
TSB Says : Truffles.  Enough Said.

:: Air Fryer and Toaster Oven :: 

Oprah Says : A toaster oven that bakes, broils, toasts, and has a built-in air fryer? What else can you ask for?
TSB Says : Everyone I know that has an air fryer absolutely LOVES it.  Such a great, easy way to make your favorite foods healthier.

:: Frozen Dessert Maker :: 

Oprah Says : We have a winner! In goes the frozen fruit, out comes silky sorbet. Did I mention that frozen berries and bananas equal zero Weight Watchers points, that the price is amazing, and that I make a soft-serve treat every night?
TSB Says : Now, if I’m honest, I don’t feel the need to make my own frozen desserts when Halo Top is down the street at Publix, but not everyone is as lazy as me…….

 

:: CLOTHING :: 

:: Tory Sport Track Pants :: 

Oprah Says : Reese Witherspoon turned me on to Tory Burch’s new sport line, and I owe her one. These track pants go with everything: a sweater and boots or heels and a blazer. I’m hooked.
TSB Says : Do I need another pair of pants to give the illusion I am heading to work out, even when that is absolutely not gonna happen? Obviously.

:: Barefoot Dreams Pajamas :: 

Oprah Says : I am a student of pajamas. In fact, the reason I started Favorite Things 21 years ago was that I had a great pair to share. The only drawback with my latest loves is that they’re so soft and stretchy, you won’t want to wear anything else.
TSB Says : My husband is so firmly against me having ANY more pajamas that cover everything except my neck it’s insane.  Same goes with Robes.  And socks.  It’s just pure temptation over here every night (insert gif).
So clearly I am in love with these.

:: Emijay Sweatshirt :: 

Oprah Says : Now, this is my travel gear. Chic sweatwear proves it’s possible to end a long plane or car ride without looking like a crumpled napkin.
TSB Says : Love this to throw on to head to a workout (or pretend I am en route to workout!)

:: Slipper Socks :: 

Oprah Says : put on these cozy sock slippers for the Favorite Things shoot, and I loved them! So will anyone you give them to, from toddlers to grandmas.
TSB Says : See above, under the PJ’s and my husband’s disappointment every night.

:: Emu Slide Slippers :: 

Oprah Says : My stepmother had furry pink slippers in 1968, and in 2017, chic women everywhere are wearing them out to lunch. Give a pair to a stylish friend and make her day.
TSB Says : These are obnoxious and I’m even more in love with them because of that.

:: HEALTH + FITNESS :: 

:: BeatSX Headphones :: 

Oprah Says : These lightweight wireless earphones really put a great-sounding song in my heart. They charge superfast (five minutes will give you up to two hours of tunes), and the magnetic buds cling together, making them easy to keep around your neck
TSB Says : I have yet to find a pair of comfortable headphones that stay put!
I’m honestly doubting they exist!

:: Spanx Active Leggings :: 

Oprah Says : Workout leggings that slim you? I’ll take two, please. The SLIM-X performance fabric of these Spanx with a double-layer waistband is lighter than air, but they still manage to smooth all over. Thank you, Sara Blakely!
TSB Says : No such thing as too many pairs of leggings, especially when they have a high waist and suck it all in.

:: Commuter Bicycle :: 

Oprah Says : This bike is a monochromatic masterpiece, a work of art that truly moves you—its two gears shift automatically. It’s light and made to last, with a basket built into the frame. You can choose from eight shades, but I can’t wait to ride my brand-new white one around Santa Barbara.
TSB Says : In Atlanta, I think you have a death sentence if you choose to ride a bike.  But for everyone else, how cute are these!

:: Phillips Sonicare :: 

Oprah Says : The first Sonicare made the list 20 years ago, and it’s only gotten better—literally one of my favorite things that I use twice a day. This year’s version is a smart toothbrush with an app that gives feedback on brushing habits, supereffective brush heads for different cleaning modes, and sensors to adjust intensity or tell you if you missed a spot. Trust me, you’ll look for excuses to brush.
TSB Says : If you do not own a Sonicare yet, you really need to get on it.  They are the absolute best.  Your mouth will never feel clean again without it!

:: GIFTS + ACCESSORIES FOR HER :: 

:: CZ Drop Earrings :: 

Oprah Says : These cubic zirconia earrings are playful enough for jeans, but I think I could get away with them for a black-tie affair. They sure look like the real deal.
TSB Says : Love these! Especially the diamond set.  Such a great gift for any lady in your life.

:: Pepper Sunglasses :: 

Oprah Says : People, these are the glasses! Tinted readers designed for outdoors, they let you see fine print and give your eyes UV400 protection to boot.
TSB Says : Great gift for parents and grandparents – who doesn’t need sunglasses they can read in!? No more layering the readers with the sunnies.

:: Earring Gift Set :: 

Oprah Says : Confession: I waited until I was 51 to get my ears pierced. You probably know someone who did it sooner—she’ll be thrilled to unwrap this pretty set of five pairs of gold-plated earrings. And you can’t beat that price!
TSB Says : Studs are my hands down go to . I love me some simple gold + pearl or gold + diamond studs.
You can choose from four different sets of 5 pairs of earrings for under $50

:: Stackable Jewelry Box :: 

Oprah Says : I keep promising myself I won’t put yet another jewelry box on Favorite Things, but these two-piece versions showed up with compartments for watches and eyeglasses, so how could I resist?
TSB Says : I received a similar stackable jewelry box for my birthday this year and I love it!

:: OTHER FAVORITES :: 

:: Magnolia + Olive Trees :: 

Oprah Says : Yes, I have olive trees in my bedroom. Everyone said they’d never make it, but I keep them turned to the light and they get bigger every day. A tree is a forever gift. It’s sunshine and earth and water, and it just grows better with time.
TSB Says : Great hostess gift, house warming gift, or something for the woman who has everyone.

:: Buffalo Check and Herringbone Throw :: 

Oprah Says : Not only do I want to see this cashmere-soft throw on my sofa, but I’d also wrap it around my shoulders on a chilly night.
TSB Says : Similar to black leggings, there is no such thing as too many throws!

:: Corkcicle Stemless :: 

Oprah Says : Here’s a 12-ounce covered stainless steel cup that keeps hot things hot for four hours, cold things cold for nine hours, and soccer moms happy right through overtime.
TSB Says : I have these in the bigger size and LOVE em.  Especially at the beach + lake to keep your cocktails cold!

:: Shower Cap :: 

Oprah Says : It’s no secret that this country is deeply divided. But here’s one thing we can all agree on: Every woman needs a good shower cap! These turban-style numbers have quick-dry fabric and a waterproof lining.
TSB Says : A shower cap is something everyone should have but I feel like no one does!? These are hands down the cutest and most stylish shower caps I have ever seen!

:: Great Thought a Day Notepad :: 

Oprah Says : With 365 inspiring quotes—and space to write your own thoughts—these pads will make channeling your genius an everyday habit.
TSB Says : When will I finally start doing this ?!? #NewYearsResolution


I was going to write that the only thing missing on the list was BREAD,
but then I realized English Muffins are on the list…..
so, my moment was ruined.

Check out all of Oprah’s Favorite Things here! 

by TheSarcasticBlonde 
fashion

:: Wish List Wednesday ::

November 1, 2017

:: Wish List Wednesday ::

lusts for the week……

Shopbop is having their 3 Day Surprise Sale with up to 40% off!

My favorites picks from the sale below !
:: Clothing ::
 

:: Accessories ::
 

 

:: Handbags ::
 

 

:: Shoes ::

 

and in case you missed it,
I shared the details on my wedding guest dress in my wedding weekend post yesterday

// DEEP V NAVY DRESS // 
  dress runs small, size up.  I am wearing a size 4.

by TheSarcasticBlonde 
fashion, weekend recap

:: Wedding Recap + Dress Details ::

October 31, 2017

:: Wedding Recap + Dress Details ::

sorry for delayed posts this week. we had no cable and internet for two days! they say the “outage is fixed” but I think something is wrong with our boxes?? anyways…. fingers crossed it’s all good now!

This past weekend I had the wedding of one of my best friend’s from college.  I know that every wedding is so special and filled with love, and that I have felt that way about every single one I have attended for a friend, but this one really was just so different.
I wish I could write a novel of a love letter blog post to the couple.

There really was more emotion and more love for two people than I have ever felt before.  I wish so badly I could put into words everything that the weekend encompassed, but the only way to ever even try to explain would be to have a video of every speech that I heard at the rehearsal dinner Friday and again at the wedding on Monday.
This is the bachelorette party I had in Austin in August where the bride went around the room and had all of us crying when she went over how much we each meant to her and what she admires in each of us.  At HER bachelorette.  Serious, she kills me.

There are people in life that have hearts bigger than most.  The amount of love, happiness, respect, generosity, kindness, and so much more that my girlfriend possesses cannot be matched by anyone I know.  For anyone to be great enough to be her partner in her friends or families eyes, or to treat her the way that she treats EVERYONE else in her life, would be a nearly impossible task.  And then along came her now-husband.
Their story in short is that he was her first boss when she graduated and moved in NYC and they were best friends for years. And years.  And years.  Everyone was waiting for them to finally wake up and realize they were meant to be, and thank goodness, eventually it happened.

She + Mike brought so many different groups of friends together and the weekend was an amazing colliding of worlds.  There wasn’t a dry eye all weekend (unless we were busy laughing our heads off).  Watching the groom’s face as she walked down the aisle (Hell – watching the grooms brother the entire ceremony even!) had everyone in tears.  SO. MUCH. LOVE.

But I’ll try to grab a tissue and LOCK IT UP and get to the actual wedding details.
I know only a handful reading this are lucky enough to know them, so I tried to be brief!
The expression “All The Feels” exists to explain this weekend.
OH! And the Bride and Groom hosted the entire weekend themselves!!!
They went above and beyond for all of their guests.

details on my dress at the bottom of post!


I’ll discuss more on Friday, but the milk thistle and charcoal pills were a god-send! 

The wedding was about 45 minutes from where they live in NYC in Tarrytown, New York at Tarrytown House + Estate.

The beautiful town is right next to Sleepy Hollow, so this fall weekend was the perfect time to go!
The weather could have been horrendous, and it was so perfect that it didn’t even make since that a weekend like that could have existed on October 28th in New York.

Thursday night we went to dinner in town which was so adorable and then went to a little dive bar called the Set Back Inn for the night, and then partied back at the cottage on the hotel property until (insert whatever you think is an insane time…. I don’t even want to say.)
Friday was beautiful and my friend and I walked all over town and onto a trail that was an old aqueduct trail down to a mansion and to the Hudson river.





Friday night was a rehearsal cocktail hour with speeches, and then a huge welcome BBQ on the patio.
The groom is Italian, so literally there was more food than you could ever imagine this weekend!



Saturday I was lucky enough to get ready with the bride and bridesmaids and get to spend the entire day with them.



I’ll find out details for where she got the monogrammed PJ sets for everyone!
They were so cute and soooo comfy.


The wedding was perfection, with several of the brides friends who are incredible singer and musicians performing during the ceremony.  Cocktail hour outside was more than most weddings.  Literally.  I kept hearing people say “wait? this isn’t dinner?!”


And then the reception, with a KILLER band to say the least, had the best food I have ever had.  You got to choose your entree at your seat and they asked how I wanted my steak cooked, and let me tell you, a well done steak that is juicy is not an easy feat, and it was better than I have had at steak houses all over Chicago.  It was nuts.
The highlight of the reception may have been the bride surprising everyone in her speech by breaking into 2 minutes of full on perfect Italian to speak to the grooms family and relatives, many of whom do not speak a lick of English.
And then they hosted everyone at the restaurant bar for a Late Night until 2 AM.
Truly one of the most fun weekends of my life!

Oh, but one of Kip’s best friends was getting married the same say in Kansas City which I so sadly had to miss, so I need to pretend I didn’t have that great of a time because he wasn’t with me.  So shhhh don’t tell.






And THEN they hosted everyone for a giant brunch Sunday before we all flew home.
Ugh.  Can we do it all again next weekend?!
The depression that sinks in after a weekend like this is insane!

Dress Details :
I bought so, so many dresses for this wedding and this was one of the first ones I bought.  I found it on sale in only one size for under $100, but it didn’t fit.  Luckily, my mom found it for me in all sizes on Amazon after I did a full “try on” of all of my options! It is light as air, so insanely comfortable, the perfect navy color, and shows the perfect little amount of skin.  Most important – since it was so last minute – I didn’t have to alter it at all! Which never, ever happens!
Unfortunately the dress isn’t a miracle worker and
my boobs didn’t quite look like the ones in the photo below…..
but otherwise, killer dress.


dress runs small, size up.  I am wearing a size 4.
// DEEP V NAVY DRESS // 
fully stocked, but for some reason different sizes are different prices on Amazon!?

also, I plan to order the dress my girlfriend was wearing, which is insanely gorgeous.  I was obsessed with it!

// BLACK OFF THE SHOULDER GOWN //
  also available HERE
there are 10 reviews of it, and every single one is 5 stars with killer reviews!
I also found it in Navy Satin   // Black Velvet // Green Velvet / Lace //
and a Similar Off The Shoulder 

Oh, and Happy Halloween!!
I’m heading over to my sister’s house to see my niece and nephew later tonight
dressed as an exhausted Aunt who can’t handle a 3 day weekend like she used to!

by TheSarcasticBlonde 
fashion

:: Ruffle Sleeve Sweater + Wish List Wednesday ::

October 25, 2017

:: Ruffle Sleeve Sweater + Wish List Wednesday ::

Cooler temps arriving mean it’s time to pull out the comfy sweaters.
This ruffle sleeve sweater has such great texture and is so unbelievably crazy soft.  Plus, it has my favorite price point of under $50! It’s only $39!  It reminds me so much of this sweater I love, which still is a great price at under $100, but I have fallen in love with others in the past that go up past two hundred. No thanks!  I love the cream color, but it also comes in a darker grey/black as well.  It’s a great piece to dress up or down;  I’ll be wearing it tucked into my black leather mini next!


:: outfit details ::
RUFFLE SLEEVE SWATER // RAG + BONE JEANS // TREASURE + BOND BOOTIES 
sweater runs TTS, I am wearing a size S

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: Lusts for the Week ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Much like my-boyfriend-Andy-Cohen, I love myself a jumpsuit.  This one is so incredibly well priced and has rave reviews for it’s fit + quality!

// BLACK JUMPSUIT // 

I love this ruffle velvet camisole – it would be perfect for casual holiday parties.

// VELVET CAMISOLE //

I love the wash on these skinny jeans – they remind me so much of my favorite pair of Rag & Bone’s but are a fraction of the cost.

// SKINNY DARK WASH JEANS // 

I love the color of this bag and it’s the perfect size to fit everything you need.
(I’m one of those that has a 20 pound purse from unnecessarily throwing everything I own inside of it every day! You know…. just incase…. )

// CARRY ALL TOTE // 

I love green color + cutout back of this dress;
it would work for so many different occasions.

// CUTOUT BACK DRESS // 

This cuff sleeve sweater is perfect for a casual but
put together look and is under $50.

// CUFF SLEEVE SWEATER // 

These berry suede pumps are 40% off right now!

// SUEDE PUMPS // 

Happy Hump Day + Happy Shopping ! 

by TheSarcasticBlonde 
fashion

:: Embroidered Sweatshirt Dress ::

October 23, 2017

:: Embroidered Sweatshirt Dress ::

I hope you all had a great weekend!!

We went up to my friends lake house at Lake Burton and it was a gorgeous up there! Everything has finally started to turn the beautiful fall colors
and it was so nice to cruise around the lake and soak it all in.

I wanted to share this super cozy sweatshirt dress that I’ve been wearing as the temps start to cool off.
The most surprising thing about this dress? It’s from Abercrombie + Fitch!
I seriously can’t get over how much great stuff they have lately!
Dresses are my favorite go-to, and on this dress I love the subtle embroidered floral shoulders.  It was warm this weekend, but I love to layer this dress with my army green anorak when it’s cooler.  It works just as great with ankle booties as it does with tall boots.  I’ve had these booties since last year and wear them constantly; they add a little bit of height without sacrificing comfort.

And this dress is also 25% off today! So shop away!


// EMBROIDERED SWEATSHIRT DRESS // BOOTIES //
runs TTS, go down a size for a more fitted look, but it will be a little shorter!
I am wearing a size XS.

Today is the last day for
25% Off Entire Purchase + Free Shipping Over $75.
Use Code: 11130
 

A few more sweatshirt dresses below :

Have a great Monday!!

 

by TheSarcasticBlonde 
fashion

:: Wish List Wednesday : Formal Wedding Guest Dresses ::

October 18, 2017

:: Wish List Wednesday : Formal Wedding Guest Dresses ::

I have a fun Wishlist Wednesday post today
focused on my favorite item of clothing : Dresses!!

I have gotten several requests for another Wedding Guest Dress post, with a focus on formal dresses for Fall + Winter weddings.  I have one of my best friends weddings next weekend, and I am still ordering and returning dresses looking for the best option! I’m not a bridesmaid but I will be getting ready with her the day of, and it is black tie optional.  Formal dresses are my favorite things to shop for in the entire world, which is perhaps why I can never make up my mind.

So, I have rounded up LOADS of gowns for you girls!

Some Sales to be aware of for dresses (and more) :
Lord + Taylor has 30% off site wide right now,
and Bloomingdales has 20-30% off site wide.

:: UNDER $200 :: 


//   ONE   //   TWO   //   THREE   //   FOUR   //   FIVE   //   SIX   // 

//   ONE   //   TWO   //   THREE   //   FOUR   //   FIVE   //   SIX   // SEVEN // 

:: UNDER $250 ::

//   ONE   //   TWO   //   THREE   //   FOUR   //   FIVE   //   



//   ONE   //   TWO   //   THREE   //   FOUR   //

AND MORE GORGEOUS FINDS………..

//   ONE   //   TWO   //   THREE   //   FOUR   //   FIVE   //   SIX   // 



//   ONE   //   TWO   //   THREE   //   FOUR   //   FIVE   //   SIX   //

 

I have found Lord & Taylor to surprisingly be one of the best resources, especially if you take the time to go through ’em all.  They always have sales + when there’s only a few sizes left they can be on super sale.  I have been hunting down a particular Halston Dress and Lord + Taylor usually has a bunch on sale.  Other good go-to’s are Bloomingdales, Nordstrom, Neimans, and Dillards (Dillards is another super random surprisingly great resource for big sales on designer gowns)

Happy Wedding Shopping!

by TheSarcasticBlonde 
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Hi. I’m Taylor

A Southern girl turned Chicago transplant, recently settling back down in Atlanta. Fluent in sarcasm. Devout Bravo-holic and TV addict. Balances fitness with french fries. Penchant for Prosecco and Pinot Grigio. Wannabe Ina Garten in the kitchen. Online shopping enthusiast. Lover of fashion and decor.

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