discuss amongst ya-selves……
:: the bachelor ::
Ohhhhh the final episode of the Bachelor.
Where they spend their final night before a proposal (or a break up) on a beautiful island in a remote area of the world they never dreamed of visiting, and have a proposal (or break up) on a mountain top overlooking crystal blue waters whilst a helicopter swirls around them and its the most incredible thing ever.
Where they spend their final night before a proposal (or a break up) on a beautiful island in a remote area of the world they never dreamed of visiting, and have a proposal (or break up) on a mountain top overlooking crystal blue waters whilst a helicopter swirls around them and its the most incredible thing ever.
OR
as was the case on monday night,
they spend their final nights in the middle of nowhere freezing their damn asses off.
When Chris visited Becca’s hotel room, I swear ABC must have attempted to re-decorate their rooms entirely and make them look nice, because through the draped curtains and throw pillows you could see straight out to the window, eye-level with the room THE FREEWAY with semi trucks RIGHT THERE and the giant light up sign for the hotel.
CLASSY.
They must have saved so much money this season. Seriously. The cost of filming must have been 1/50th what it is for other seasons.
(once again…. if I had been on this show and cast for this season, I would have been like “UMM this is bullsh*t when are we flying around the world to a different exotic locale every week?”
My favorite part of the whole episode:
Chris and Becca are having their final convo, where Becca still won’t say ANYTHING even remotely close to what Chris wants to hear.
“I know that you want me to know but I don’t and you know but I don’t know ”
(clearly I don’t remember exactly what they said but it went on for SERIOUSLY like 5 minutes)
and all I was hearing was the episode of Friends
“THEY DON’T KNOW THAT WE KNOW THAT THEY KNOW WE KNOW!”
it’s painful to watch chris try to have a conversation. he doesn’t talk. truly cannot form sentences. it’s ridiculous. reason 9847 this season of the bachelor sucked.
(and THANK GOD whitney said she didn’t watch any of the season because this whole finale episode is Chris blatantly stating that he just wishes becca would say I love you so that he could pick her. awwkkkkwwaaaard).
ps. i love that becca is the first human on all 72 seasons of this to realistically say “I’m falling for you but no I don’t love you and no I’m not moving somewhere, especially the middle of nowhere, until I know that the relationship is going to work.”
DUH PEOPLE. DUH.
the success rate of these relationships is as high as the percentage of times I decline another alcohol beverage or carbohydrate.
for his and whitney’s final hotel room visit at the beautiful Dubuque Hotel,
she proclaims that she loves him once again, one reason being that she can finish his sentences. well at least one of you can.
side note: I HATE when people say “I’m so glad you asked me that question……”
WHO ARE YOU? WHO TALKS LIKE THAT? this isn’t an interview and its annoying as hell in an interview because everyone knows its code for CRAP IM THINKING……..
I guess what Chris lacks in actual verbal communication he makes up for with his highly mobile eyebrows and facial expressions.
but I digress…..
when it actually was time for proposal,
DAMN they made that barn over.
the set designers must have worked their asses off!
How many u hauls are hiding down the road filled to the brim…. and generators to power everything?
and STILL, even though I’m sure there were a million space heaters, you can see HIS BREATH when he is talking to these girls.
this seriously could not be less romantic if you tried. those poor girls must have been freezing.
good thing the bachelor stylist picked matching crushed velvet dresses for them to keep them warm.
(side note, despite me laughing my head off, they both looked banging in the crushed velvet dresses – bods for days).
chris kisses becca on the lips upon entering, because you totes do that when you are about to propose to another woman in 10 minutes. he also does not want to let her go and is close talking to her and basically trying to kiss her again before she lives and beccas face clearly shows she couldn’t care less and knows she dogged a bullet with that one. no tears. zero f’s given.
:: after the final rose ::
becca is so pretty I can’t stand it. and clearly is the smartest woman in the world for saying what every woman in america thinks about getting engaged to a man that was dating other women up until 5 minutes before he proposes.
if whitney watched any of the show, she would not be nearly as crazy in love as she seems to be.
Chris : “I told the producers I want to marry someone exactly like my sisters.”
oh my goodness …….. go back to not talking and mumbling chris seriously…..
and as for the only real part of the after the final rose, the announcement of the bachelorette,
I feel like I have no words. I’m speechless.
I didn’t think it could be worse than the worst case scenario: Britt. But wait. It is.
how was it too hard to decide between two women chris?
the audience was basically boo’ing her when you asked if american wanted her as the bachelorette? what?
I hope she knows the audience didn’t clap at all for her.
they come out and britt looks like a moron and kaitlyn looks ready to punch her she’s so annoyed.
britt was on the tv for 4 minutes and I already was screaming STOP FLIPPING YOUR HAIR.
I can’t. I just can’t.
this may be the first time since the creation of the show that I don’t watch a season.
them’s fighting words ABC I mean it.
but for real I am PISSED.
and for real STOP FLIPPING YOUR HAIR.
while googling for pictures for this post, these two pictures came up.
I repeat, I just can’t.
(those of you that don’t watch the bachelor are so excited all of this is over and I can stop talking about it :D)
MOVING ON…….
I cannot wait for the season premiere of Southern Charm next week!
set your DVR’s!!
I forgot to set my DVR for Shah’s of Sunset and have yet to see the first two episodes because they aren’t on demand! Help! I’ve heard they’re incredible and the clips I saw lead me to believe nothing less.
:: vanderpump reunion ::
kristin looked weird
on WWHL my-boyfriend-andy-cohen said viewers were writing that she looked pregnant and I thinking YES but on WWHL she looked like her normal 10 pound bitchy crazy self.
on WWHL my-boyfriend-andy-cohen said viewers were writing that she looked pregnant and I thinking YES but on WWHL she looked like her normal 10 pound bitchy crazy self.
UM sheana’s lips. I really hope that was a make up trick she’s trying out because she looked like she was stung by a hornets nest on her upper lip.
What is it that we are going to find out next week about why Stassi really hates Scheana because I’m excited!
I will never understand how Jax gets ANYONE for a million reasons but on top of all of it he is so scary looking…. he looked like a 90 year old scar from the lion king at the reunion.
What is it that we are going to find out next week about why Stassi really hates Scheana because I’m excited!
I will never understand how Jax gets ANYONE for a million reasons but on top of all of it he is so scary looking…. he looked like a 90 year old scar from the lion king at the reunion.
:: KUWTK ::
Keeping up with The Kardashians was never a top viewing show of mine, but they replay it so much that I always end up seeing all the episodes during my weekend hangover not moving for 8 hours off the couch binge.
This season, however, that starts March 15th, will be an exception.
I will be DVR’ing ALL of em. It’s gonna be nuts.
there are preview clips here and I’m real confused.
bruce is becoming a lady, but he is secretly talking to one of his ex wifes best friends?
I don’t get it.
unrelated, but Khloe’s new house looks insane.
then I googled and it says it is BEIBER’s old house and I threw up in my mouth a little.
:: RHOBH ::
I want to move to amsterdam this place looks AMAZING
who knew it was beautiful and had such yummy food?
those pancakes that vanderpump and kyle definitely did not eat more than one bite of looked insane.
my ignorant ass only thinks of red lights and pot when I think of amsterdam.
I should have known it would be as fabulous as yolanda.
I should have known it would be as fabulous as yolanda.
the insanity that is this amsterdam trip continues……
I’m super disappointed in Lisa Rinna for acting like nothing has happened with Kim five seconds after the most insane scene ever. I’m hoping its just to get through the trip and that back in the states she is serious about being done with her.
I’m super disappointed in Lisa Rinna for acting like nothing has happened with Kim five seconds after the most insane scene ever. I’m hoping its just to get through the trip and that back in the states she is serious about being done with her.
brandi, just leave.
you suggest saying nice things about people, then you only say a physical feature, then you leave the table when its time to say something about you.
YOU MAKE NO SENSE.
:: jackhole of the week ::
I mean, seriously.
:: jackhole of the week ::
I mean, seriously.
as always, ignore my own blatant grammatical errors whilst I make fun of others poor grammar during coffee talk on a weekly basis.
#hypocrite #sorryimnotsorry
I write these posts late at night while simultaneously watching Bravo, taking snapchats of my snoring husband, and making to do lists of everything I was supposed to do and didn’t do that day and likely won’t do the next day either. or the day after that.
I really dont want to watch next season's bachelorette because why are you going to make these two girls fight for the attention of 25 men?! It's just way more weird than normal lol! xo, Biana – BlovedBoston
This has to be one of your best coffee talks!! I am in tears laughing at your commentary!! That Karen Walker gif gets me every single time!!!!
I am 100% with you on the Bachelor. I would have been SO pissed if I was on this season. The only reason I'd ever go on it was so I could basically booze and lay by a pool all day long in tropical locations. Not effing Dubuqe!
HATE HATE HATE that Britt is going to be one of the bachelorettes, she's just so annoying. #teamkaitlyn
Also I am so over Brandi, Andy really needs to fire her. She's just too much.