The Sarcastic Blonde

fashion, food, fitness + a dose of sarcastic gossip

Lifestyle

Friday Randoms

random thoughts for the week….. 

I’m recovering from an impromptu Chinese feast last night when a friend was stuck in town for work.
Everything was amazing until we opened up our fortunes.
what the hell? 
It may be the copious amounts of wine talking, 
but I think they got me hooked on American Idol.
Atleast, hooked on Lazaro and Kaz Bah (Spelling?)

watch this.  and cry.
I love you Lazaro.  

these pumps from J. Crew are calling my name.



I found an amazing, new to me, Southern Cooking Blog: Twirl and Taste

I need to make one of EVERYTHING. 

I found this sweater/coat via Chic Geek.
I must have you! 
Fraction of the price of the similar J.Crew coats. 


Pumps + Iron, a workout + healthy eating blog, posted about Peppermint Oil this week.

Sounds like something worth trying – and I like peppermint tea anyways so why not? Plus, I’m thinking I could maybe eat as much crap as I want, quit working out, and chug a bottle of it and maybe everything would even itself out? pleaaaaase. 
No, but really, have any of you tried this for any therapeutic reasons?

The $20 Penny Chic dresses that were on the blogs this week are calling my name.
Especially the one on CouldIHaveThat – maybe the dress will make me look that tall and skinny with killer legs and look exactly like Emma Stone?!
I have a night out with my loves tonight
#fbf 2011

and a friends wedding tomorrow 
and the Oscars Sunday!

happy weekend 🙂 
xoxo

by  
Lifestyle

Coffee Talk

discuss amongst ya-selves…… 
  
just when you think courtney stodden
(the crazy slut girl who married the 51 year old at 16)
cant get any creepier….. 
that is not her husband.
THAT IS HER DAD.
as in – HER FATHER.
I don’t even know where this edition of Coffee Talk is going to go from here, because this has repulsed me so much.  
Kesha… oh, sorry Ke$ha, 
has some show coming out on MTV.
where she drinks her own urine. 
she was “trying to be healthy.”
see…. I warned you… this Coffee Talk is all kinds of messed up. 

The Bachelor:
now that Tierra is gone most of it is a big yawn, but:
we’ll start with Ashley Ashlee
Oh, sorry again, it’s AshLee
{what is wrong with people?}

you are really annoying with the child voice and slow dramatic emotional speeches and commentary.
if you close your eyes and listen to her talk, you would think you were listening to a 9 year old.  or a really high emotional basketcase.
lock it up. 
yelling “I love sean” in baby voice. 

new drinking game: everytime ash-LEE says THIS MAN.
crying. while saying “this man is just so amazing, i just love this man so much, this man blah de blah blah” 97 times in her confessional session.

then she starts CRYING talking to her parents about the Polar Bear Plunge.
it is not a giant metaphor for your life…. seriously.
it’s just another time for producers to get girls to be in a bikini doing something idiotic with sean. 
in other news,
the Tierra terror is already engaged to someone else?
I guess the Bachelor didn’t steal her “sparkle”.
I know not all of you watch The Bachelor, but everyone needs to appreciate her sparkle comments. She was the hated girl in the house with no friends & she announced to the girls that “My parents said I have sparkle, and not to let any one take away my sparkle!!! ” 
yes, girls don’t like you because you sparkle! 
your mom is totally right! 
UMMMMM. 
I can’t even. 
no words. 

RHOBH:
Adrienne needs to just be kicked off the Real Housewives.
She literally yells over everyone anytime she speaks, and all she says is “Noooooooo.”
“No…… that’s not nice.”
“Now that’s not true.  That’s not true.”
She seriously doesn’t say anything except draw out vowels anytime she speaks.  And her horrid hair, clothing, and makeup aren’t making up for what is coming out of her mouth.  
Except at the Nose Job Reveal Party.
(which is a totally normal party).
She couldn’t stop bringing up how her husband would have done “as good a job… or better!” to everyone, including the doctor, on Kim’s nose.
yeah…. I liked you better not talking. 
I guess we realized that she IS capable of paying her husband a compliment and acknowledging his presence.  I think it’s the first second-hand nice complement she has ever said about him. {Don’t worry… she didn’t say it to his face.  She would never say anything nice to his face}.
P.S. Marisa, who also needs to GET OFF THE SHOW,
was wearing a BROWN SCRUNCHIE. 
I swear.  I rewound three times to check. 
oh, and the stuff about her husband she said last week at Lisa’s tea party? He needs to divorce your 80’s ass.  

LeAnn is suing her dentist
aka LeAnn continues her obnoxious attempts to be in the media at all times
now, I have no clue if he did botched crown work or not.  But saying he is responsible for you not having a career? Awww…. that’s cute.  I wonder how many tweets you are going to send out about this, since tweeting, begging media outlets to pay attention to you, and begging your husband not to leave you seems to have been your “career” for the past 3 years. 
p.s. yeah….. when you put things over your teeth, your speech/voice may change.
Hello, didn’t you hear Jewel say over and over for years that’s why she avoided braces?? 
Come on LeAnn. PAY ATTENTION. 
sweet purse John Mayer
everyone needs a good cross-body. 
Oprah, good heavens.
I think you even made Beyonce want to vomit about herself.
even for you, this was ridiculous.
{watch the 4 minute video here}
woof. 

Amanda Bynes continues to be cah-razy.
She stated, in a 25 Things you don’t know about me to Us Weekly (how the hell she even managed to get that as press I don’t even know)
“I moved to New York City and I love it. I’ve already lost 4 pounds! I weigh 121 – my goal weight is 100.”
She is 5’8″.  
100 pounds!?! 
someone get this girl some help already. fast.

RiRi got the sweetest Valentine’s gift from her angelic boyfriend.
A bouquet of pot! 
He seriously is just every girls dream. 
side note:
I cannot stop playing Stay.
It is amazing. Damn you RiRi. 
xoxo
by  
Lifestyle

wishlist wednesday

lusts for the week….. 
    
there’s just something about a red dress…

Yummy Tummy Leggings 
have any of you tried yummy tummy before?
thoughts? 


Alice + Olivia Drop Waist Dress  


Marc Jacobs Umbrella
is this not the cutest umbrella ever?  


Striped Sweater Dress
my favorite things all in one place
dress + stripes + lace


Open Back Red + White Top
anything backless is good with me.   


xoxo

by  
Lifestyle

Crack of the Week: The Greatest Lasagna. Seriously.

My favorite thing to do on Saturday mornings is watch the new episodes on The Food Network.
A line up of Pioneer Woman + Barefoot Contessa + Paula’s Best Dishes makes my heart (and my stomach) flutter.  
On Saturday, Ree made lasagna and I instantly knew it would be Sunday’s comfort food to end the weekend.  
Not a healthy dish, but definitely worth it.
I have never made a lasagna where there is a cottage cheese mixture, and also slices of cheese as additional layers.  It makes A WORLD of a difference.  The man friend and I decided no other lasagna recipe will ever be used in the future.  
  
*I use the lasagna noodles you don’t have to cook before assembling.  It tastes just as great, and is 10x easier and faster. We altered the portions to what seemed like a normal 9×13 pan would be, because the recipe below makes 12 servings.  

Ingredients

  • 1-1/2 pound Ground Beef
  • 1 pound Hot Breakfast Sausage
  • 2 cloves Garlic, Minced
  • 2 cans (14.5 Ounce) Whole Tomatoes
  • 2 cans (6 Ounce) Tomato Paste
  • 2 Tablespoons Dried Parsley
  • 2 Tablespoons Dried Basil
  • 1 teaspoon Salt
  • 3 cups Lowfat Cottage Cheese
  • 2 whole Beaten Eggs
  • 1/2 cup Grated (not Shredded) Parmesan Cheese
  • 2 Tablespoons Dried Parsley
  • 1 teaspoon Salt
  • 1 pound Sliced Mozzarella Cheese
  • 1 package (10 Ounce) Lasagna Noodles
  • (add 1/2 Teaspoon Salt And 1 Tablespoon Olive Oil To Pasta Water)

Preparation Instructions

Bring a large pot of water to a boil.
Meanwhile, in a large skillet or saucepan, combine ground beef, sausage, and garlic. Cook over medium-high heat until browned. Drain half the fat; less if you’re feeling naughty. Add tomatoes, tomato paste, 2 tablespoons parsley, basil and salt. After adding the tomatoes, the sauce mixture should simmer for 45 minutes while you are working on the other steps.
In a medium bowl, mix cottage cheese, beaten eggs, grated Parmesan, 2 more tablespoons parsley, and 1 more teaspoon salt. Stir together well. Set aside. Cook lasagna until “al dente” (not overly cooked).
To assemble:
Arrange 4 cooked lasagna noodles in the bottom of a baking pan, overlapping if necessary. Spoon half the cottage cheese mixture over the noodles. Spread evenly. Cover cottage cheese with a layer of mozzarella cheese. Spoon a little less than half the meat/sauce mixture over the top.
Repeat, ending with meat/sauce mixture. Sprinkle top generously with extra Parmesan.
Either freeze, refrigerate for up to two days, or bake immediately: 350-degree oven for 20 to 30 minutes, or until top is hot and bubbly.

xoxo

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