discuss amongst ya-selves…….
:: DWTS ::
one of my all time faves Dancing With The Stars is almost back for it’s new season.
when I heard Mischa Barton was on this seasons cast, I was super excited.
I really hope she has some kind of skill because hopefully this can be a turning point for her
*for those of you laughing at DWTS being a turning point for her career, UM YEAH
it can be. respect the D-list to B-list powers of DWTS*
:: bachelor : the women tell all ::
I had high hopes for the Women Tell All… it’s always such a big night before finale night… but it just wasn’t that interesting if ya ask me. I think I’ve seen too many “most dramatic ____ in Bachelor history” that my expectations can be too high…. I was looking a Juan Pablo Women Tell All or a Jason Picks the Reject After The Final Rose…. but alas, not much was there.
damn I miss Michael Kors on Project Runway
and seriously why is the chicken getting more air time than anyone here? when they aren’t talking about the chicken or panning to the chicken, the chicken is in the background of the key girls shots while they talk. huh? this was SUCH a weak Women Tell All that A CHICKEN had to be a main character?
10 bucks that girl and the damn chicken are in Paradise…..
WHY is the Canadian chick that was barely on this show chiming in every two seconds
I love when the girl calls her out “YOU WERENT THERE JAMI”
QUIT TRYING TO GET AIR TIME JAMI.
YOU’RE CHANCE AT 7 MINUTES OF FAME AND BACHELOR IN PARADISE ARE OVER JAMI.
and good lord put your breasts back in your dress.
Olivia had tears in her eyes the whole time
I actually felt really bad for her. She seemed embarrassed and affected by everything…. and then she said despite all the things being said all over the internet about her that the mouth stuff was funny.
YEAH GIRL. it is. Good for you for having sense of humor about that at least.
but you’re still crazy and were mean….
i loved the blooper where becca says chris instead of ben 🙂 go girl. show em how much you dont care about the rejection
of course lace is going to paradise, and of course i will be watching
the rumors are swirling about caila being the next bachelorette….
if caila is the next bachelorette I will LOSE IT
she is too nice and sweet and normal and this would be AWFULLLLL.
but she really didn’t smile the whole episode like I predicted….. I was way off….
and Ben, I’m glad you’re so confident about marrying the girl you picked TOMORROW.
because it looks like when you were getting engaged TOMORROW you still had no idea who you would be engaged to.
THESE POOR GIRLS! I already feel so bad for the runner up!
unless its JoJo and she becomes the Bachelorette!!!!!
PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD
:: vanderpump rules ::
Katie just walks right up to Lisa and is like “hey! you know where we’d love to have our engagement party? your house!”
yeah, no crap, her mansion would be a lovely place, but that’s not how this works. manners for days with these sur kids.
So, Kristin and James meet for dinner + drink (well James is ‘sober’ so just more drinks for Kristin)
James: “I’m ready to be the guy my mom raised me to be”
just stop talking about your mom. period. we are still trying to get the gross stuff out of our heads from last week.
Oh my gosh their spat tonight at dinner reminded me that I don’t think I ever commented on the fight at the Pucker + Pout blog party, where he went to be like ‘I love and miss you’ and confess his love, and two seconds after she is like “um I came here with someone” he starts screaming and cussing her out and calling her a whore…..
the two of them are just nuts.
so, of course, after last nights meet up, they “bone” as they like to call it.
i really need to believe in myself the way that kristin does.
she TRULY thinks she is the biggest “Catch” in the world.
when the gang attends a Turtle Race (californians. seriously.), we learn that katie slept with kristen’s current boyfriend before she started dating tom…. and since these people CANNOT talk to or sleep with anyone that isnt somehow part of the incetual sur family this results in ZERO shock whatsoever.
Jax takes Brittany on a date specifically to stare at the way-too-big-she-should-have-gotten-Cs-like-she-wanted boobs that he bought.
Tom says the only smart comment he has ever said, and also said with great sarcasm.
about Jax being shocked and appalled that Brittany wants to get married someday
“Jax moved her out from Kentucky, bought her boobs, tells her he loves her, and now she has the nerve to ask about the possibility of marriage some day?”
I honestly thought after he said it that a producer must have fed it to him because he has zero ability to be funny on his own
Tom, the one that shaves his forehead, tapes his bands music video, and I can’t even begin to explain the video because I just can’t.
Also, how long have I been watching TV, because the chorus of this song is seriously catchy and I’m thinking I like it….
SOS. SEND HELP.
jax’s jail comments on the way to the airport to report to Hawaii for his felony charges are just so perfectly Jax and spot on.
“People keep asking me if I’m nervous about jail, but, I feel like I’m already in jail in my apartment.”
and he loops it all back in the same sentence to brittany moving in too quick somehow.
he seriously just manipulates everything — yeah, theft is totally looped back to brittany, damn I can’t believe her!!!
:: WWHL ::
my-boyfriend-andy-cohen had the 4 vanderpump rules girls on after this weekend episode, and I’ve got to say, I agree with him that they all looked possibly the best they have ever looked.
UM when did kristen get a boob job?
where have I been?
those have NOT been in existence in the past.
did she see jax’s on-speed-dial plastic surgeon ????
I get so excited whenever Kristen is going to be on WWHL.
for a lot of reasons, really. but probably not what you think.
watching her watch herself in the monitors is UNREAL. more than anyone else that I have ever seen on the show, she just stares at herself. she does a full blown fake laugh and smile and spends the whole 30 minutes playing the persona of “crazy free Kristen”.
she looks and acts so damn ridiculous.
this week was especially good because there were the 3 other girls on with her too, so she thought maybe there wasn’t as much attention on her and she really went for it.
before my-boyfriend-andy-cohen even finished the last word of his first joke she was already fake laughing like it was just HI-larious.
:: RHOBH ::
the dinner party at Erika Jayne’s would have been some serious drama IF they hadn’t played it out entirely differently in the commercials….
it was not at ALL what they led you to think it was with the incessant previews and that really drives me nuts.
erika’s husband saying “you have to leave” wasn’t being yelled at katherine, it was being said to LVP when she had already said she needed to go.
he was basically being like “UH Ok Kathryn won’t stop talking let me try to get you out of here because you said you had to go 10 minutes ago, so you need to leave”
my goodness…..eeerrrrrr so annoying.
and I am just so done with Kathryn.
done.
adios. after the reunion taping let’s see ya never.
even your housewives-hot-husband of the year can’t save your spot on that sofa lady.
(and I bet my-boyfriend-andy-cohen is PEESEDDD about that one. he’s probably reason #1 she got cast in the first place.)
it starts with multiple jabs at Rinna about not eating…. and one comment that actually is funny would be fine, but it’s like, you aren’t being funny at all so just knock it off. the only person that needs to “get a sense of humor” is you. no one is laughing at you.
then she talk and talks and talks and talks and everyone wants to plug their ears and shake their heads back and forth.
in response to her tattling on erika to LVP about the “web” hurting their future friendships she says “no it will not”.
Um. YES it will, and its not your decision, Erika’s already done with you lady.
then she informs Erika that she “is losing this argument.”
Um.
How much wine have you had? And can we get you a muzzle?
The only thing I really enjoy about Erika’s husband Tom during all of this is when he says “Is this how all of you act all the time?”
I can so see my husband, and any rational human, thinking the exact same thing if they were at a housewives dinner. Like, um, what is going on here? Aren’t you all, like, 40-50 years old?
But otherwise, Tom makes me uncomfortable.
I’m with Kyle that my husband would tell me to shush all of NEVER before his ass would be handed to him on a platter 🙂
However, I respect that Erika knows what she’s in and whats expected of their relationship and of her, and clearly she is okay with it. I don’t think she’ll allow any one else to tell her what to do, but it seems like they have some kind of understanding, so who am I to judge their relationship
(oh wait…. a blogger who talks about everyone on Bravo in detail…. thats right….)
but seriously. she’s a grown ass woman who does whatever the hell she wants including dress in sheer nonexistent clothing and perform at clubs, so they must have some kind of understanding and ground rules between them? whatever floats her boat.
#teamerikajaynealldayeveryday
and then the icing on the Go-Away-Kathryn-Cake is that she says that she started ALL of this Shey*te just to get a reaction out of Erika.
oh girl. you don’t know who you are messing with it.
don’t poke the bear that is Erika Jane.
and then Eileen and Rinna meet up at the beach and Rinna JUST WONT STOP with the Yolanda stuff.
(and Eileen, God love ya, immediately cuts it off with ‘I’m not going there’.)
Ughhhhhhh. Please. Stop. It. You are making me so mad!!!!
AND OH EM GEE.
I need to send a thousand thank you’s to a reader for commenting about Rinna’s armpits in her commentary shots. I don’t know have I never commented on it before because I am always thinking about it when I see it.
There is not one ounce of fat on that woman body, and I’d kill for a bod like that, and I am going to hell in a hand basket, but my goodness girl put on some sleeves because that armpit situation is straight up MESSED UP. What is going on back there??? I can’t peel my eyes away from it!!!
:: jackhole of the week ::
mariah.
quit acting like you STILL don’t know who my girl JLo is!
over you.
Ok my eyes are crossing….. I’m scared because I feel like I just typed A LOT and the few things I went through and corrected made ZERO sense the way that I originally had them…..
…… soooooo good luck + Godspeed deciphering the rest of it!!
EDITORS NOTE :
as always, ignore my own blatant grammatical errors whilst I make fun of others poor grammar during coffee talk on a weekly basis.
as always, ignore my own blatant grammatical errors whilst I make fun of others poor grammar during coffee talk on a weekly basis.
#hypocrite #sorryimnotsorry
I write these posts late at night while simultaneously watching Bravo, taking snapchats of my snoring husband, and making to do lists of everything I was supposed to do and didn’t do that day and likely won’t do the next day either. or the day after that.
