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The Sarcastic Blonde

fashion, food, fitness + a dose of sarcastic gossip

health, Lifestyle

:: favorite workout classes ::

July 12, 2016

:: favorite workout classes ::
I meant to post about some of my favorite Chicago workout spots awhile ago, so why not now! 

My last week in Chicago I had finished my final day at work the Friday before and had the week to pack the house before the movers + Kip arrived on Saturday.

I have been using ClassPass for the past year or so and really love it.  I don’t belong to any gyms and do most of my workouts at home, so it was a good way to start trying out group classes without joining a gym – which I don’t think I’ll ever do again. I never went. 
I started with Pure Barre and slowly started trying out other classes (mostly thanks to my friend Emily who always tried new classes and was always willing to go to others with me!) 

My last week I signed up for a workout class every single morning at 7 AM so that I was forced to still get up as if I was going to work like every other day. Then, I had my workout done and was able to tackle the whole day of packing boxes and getting things finished up and it made it so much less stressful.

My biggest regret is not trying two of the studios below out prior to my last week living in Chicago because I LOVED them so much, so I wanted to still talk about them so that all of you Chicagoans can still go and hopefully love it too! 

:: Pure Barre ::
Pure Barre is pretty much everywhere now so this one doesn’t apply to Chicagoans only which is great! I know most of you probably get the gist of what its about, but I really love Pure Barre so if you haven’t tried it you must! Your first class is only $15 (and they are on ClassPass of course) and its such a quick hour that really, really works your muscles and tones you up.  Cant say enough good things about it! 

I haven’t been able to take one of their platform classes yet so I’m looking forward to trying one of those soon! 


:: Shred 415 :: 


I regret not trying this out until right before I moved SO much because there is nothing like it that I have seen or heard of in Atlanta and they only have studios in Chicago and I think Indy coming soon ( sorry, non-Chicagoans).  
The premise is four 15 minute workouts – you either start on treadmill or on floor and then rotate – so 2 times on treadmill and 2 times on floor using weights or a ball or your body weight. 
My friend I always workout with kept wanting me to go but I was terrified of the treadmill portion because I can’t run, or even really jog, for the life of me.  Especially at an incline.
Luckily my other friend convinced me to go and I seriously loved it.
The room was dark (you have no idea how key that is to me – I do not glow, I drip sweat) and the instructor was so nice helping me figure it all out before we started and somehow despite a million things going on around you and her talking to the people on the floor while you are on the treadmill it just works.  Plus, my friend was a pro at it so I was able to follow her lead which helped a ton.
If you haven’t tried this class, DO IT.  It was such a great workout – I know so many women who are dedicated to really only that and their bodies are simply insane.
The instructor had a bod for days and that alone will be motivating enough to keep you coming back – promise! 

:: Power Sculpt Fitness :: 
This is a small studio in Lakeview that has one building with classes like pilates and barre and TRX or who knows what (but I never saw that building) and then another building on Greenview that has a small spin studio.  It’s location was right on my way home from work and super convenient. 
I decided to try them out because on Wednesday nights after work they had 30 minute Theme Ride spin classes.  I think the first one I saw was 80’s themed and I was like…. okay…. I can do 30 minutes and I’ve been wanting to try spinning and just do it.
The instructor was super sweet, its a small dark room, and the class never had more than 10 people in it (I think it only fits like 20 anyway?).  The studio is just small and not at all intimidating that it was the perfect way to get more comfortable with spin. 
30 minutes and you’re out the door! 
But then…. they started using those performance screens. 
I hate those damn performance screens.
At Flywheel you can “opt out” or use a different username or whatever so it’s fine… with this, the only way you can know what resistance you are at or anything for class is to turn your bike on which immediately puts you up on the screen.
WOOF. NO THANKS. 
And then the girl I liked for the 30 minute class kept having a sub who was the opposite of her smiley personality and the opposite of my style of working out.
She was like SCREAMING at you and all militant like and then would be like “BIKE 12 YOU NEED TO BE OVER 475 MPH OR ELSE YOU ARENT WORKING HARD ENOUGH”.  I mean maybe not 475 mph…… but basically.  It would be like “We all have to be above 15 on the resistance or you aren’t working hard enough!” and then she’s like staring at you when you aren’t above that number.  



Or “We all have 30 seconds to bike 97 miles (seriously…. I promise that was the time frame…. maybe it just felt like it?) and it would be me and like one other person just me that wasn’t making the distance in time and it was like PUBLIC SHAME ON YOU BIKE #12. 


I’m like, listen lady friend.  I believe I am paying YOU and I am the one choosing to workout so just back off! I don’t know what all these other people in here do because damn they can move those legs fast, but I for one am NOT doping or taking any performance enhancement drugs and my dream is not to be Lance Armstrong.  I just want to sweat out my booze and food and feel like I accomplished something while I plan what I’m going to eat for dinner while I watch Real Housewives so LAY OFF. 

I skipped a Wednesday when it was that same instructor again, and when it was the SAME one again and not my sweet smiley girl I decided to BUCK UP and GO! 
and when I got there…… 
I just didn’t turn my bike on at all 🙂 So I had no idea what resistance was or where I was supposed to be at and I just biked whatever I felt.


I may or may not have had some serious glares because there were like 6 people in the class and only 5 on the screen and I was like  YEAH THAT’S RIGHT I’m biking like a granny an theres nothing you can do about it.
….. and end rant. 

But really…. I like the studio a lot 🙂 Can’t you tell? 
 Cheap, has parking *WOO HOO*, and lots of short 30 minute classes.
And most people like the screens and competitive teachers and the yelling motivation. 

:: Full Psycle ::
This is a spinning studio in Lincoln Park/Old Town – its right off of Clybourne behind Pottery Barn Kids and has *PARKING* which never exists anywhere in Chicago and was a huge motivation for me to leave my house at 6:40 AM knowing I could just drive over, park, and walk right in.

I loved this so much that I went every day I could my last week there.  It was so great.
The teacher was so nice, the room was dark, and the music was great.  She used the screen where you are compared to others in the class but because it was such a different atmosphere and she changed it up so that it was only showing your place a couple of times (like, I only had to see that I was in last place or second to last place a few times) I didn’t even mind.
BUT – seriously – the real reason you need to go here……
other than that the room looks like the Kimmy Schmidt spin studio ……


at the end of class, when you are getting ready to do your stretches and cool down, and man walks in with a silver tray of ICE COLD towels.
ICE. COLD.
after EVERY. CLASS.
it was HEAVEN ON EARTH.  
I’m not kidding….. for that alone I would have showed up to this place and become a regular.  It was life changing and any workout that gets you sweating like a spin class should do this.
The fact that $35 Soul Cycle doesn’t do something like that – they should be ashamed of themselves.
When I go to visit Chicago I will be using my ClassPass to go because I will do anything for that towel at the end of a workout. 


I’ve been doing all of my workouts at home for the past month since we moved, but I’ve promised myself that starting next week I will start trying out new studios.
They have Flywheel here but currently none are in an ideal location – but thats okay I can still give it a try.  
Of course they have Pure Barre too so I need to get back into that because I really do miss it.  
What are your favorite workout classes and studios?
Atlanta girls, any places you recommend trying?! 



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by TheSarcasticBlonde 
Lifestyle, weekend recap

:: weekend recap ::

July 11, 2016

:: weekend recap ::

image
Hope you all had a great weekend!!! 



Friday night Kip and I went to a local tapas place for cocktails and we were the youngest people by like 20+ years.  Let me just say, it was an amazing time. No joke. The people were rowdy and put some of our friends to shame.  Ladies were falling all over the place.  I sadly think we have found a new hangout spot while we are living here in the burbs 🙂 
I love some good people watching…… 

Saturday we met with friends at ladybird grove + mess hall.
 iI was such a cute spot right on the Beltline (it was our first time seeing the Beltline…. now we just need to go walk it! the beltline is like the 606 in Chicago and the high line in NYC). There is tons of outdoor space with picnic tables and lots of areas to mingle. 



Several bar crawls were going on and one group was a mario kart themed pub crawl and I really should have taken a picture of them because they were so cute; full costumes even in the scorching heat and even a fishing pole with a sign that says “final lap” and the floating traffic light and everything.
Of course I took no photos – whoops – so here are some from their website. 
But seriously the burger was one of the BEST I’ve ever, ever had. highly recommend it and we will be back! 




It’s been fun seeing new areas every weekend that didn’t exist when I lived here growing up.  Atlanta is like an entire new city and I am clueless.  i’m so annoying (in general, but probably more so now) and am always asking people where they live because I have no idea where anything is and need to broaden our house hunting options since I’ve only been looking in one small area. 

I saw this link for best restaurants along the beltline and am hoping we can hit some of these spots up soon! 


 Sunday was a great day with pool time + another delicious steak from Kip and Ina’s Potato Salad for dinner. 
Kip has really upped his grilling game (hallelujah! finally!) and we are having some great meals. 


I wanted to share one of my favorite finds lately : 
When J.Crew Factory had one of their big 50% off sales I stocked up on a few pieces, and these two pairs of shorts are a favorite.

With the elastic waist on the polka dot pair they are SUPER comfy and you can also situate them higher or lower on your hips to make them longer or shorter which is so nice. 
Since I love them so much I’m going to try this cute pair and even change it up with these shorts too. 
 Today is 40% OFF and FREE SHIPPING! use code FROZEN 




:: polka dot shorts :: 


these run TTS 




:: polka dot shorts ::   //  lilly tank top // kendra scott necklace // old TB sandals (similar) 




I had been on a serious hunt for white shorts and everything was failing.  



These have a lot of stretch in them and are super soft,  and you can adjust the cuff at the bottom (which I just realized) so I’m hoping to make them thinner.  




:: white shorts :: 

These do run big, so order down at least one size and then tap yourself on the back for going dress a pant size or two with zero effort! 🙂 


:: white shorts ::  // joie top, same in a different navy print





I always find the best Joie tops at Nordstrom Rack and when I looked online to see if they still had the print I’m wearing above I found this gorgeous one for 55% off.  


:: joie silk top ::


their fabrics are perfect for the summer heat 


and I constantly wear them because of the flattering flow cut. 



Bachelorette and RhoOC are finally back tonight! 
And the BEST sale ever, the Nordstrom semi-annual sale for cardholders kicks off THURSDAY 🙂 



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by TheSarcasticBlonde 
coffee talk, Lifestyle

:: COFFEE TALK ::

July 8, 2016

:: COFFEE TALK ::
discuss amongst ya-selves……

it was a fairly depressing week in TV considering the holiday weekend meant no new episodes for several shows, but bachelorette and OC and more will be back next week hallelujah! 

:: southern charm reunion : part II :: 
I, for one, was disappointed with this second half…. I mean, it was still enjoyable, but no new bombshells really occurred.


we ended part I with the alcohol and drug accusations and kathryn walking off the stage, but alas, she cannot (or will not) discuss anything involving court or drug tests.  COME ON! Even though I know from my times pulling my hair our watching Teresa Guidice say “I can’t discuss that” to every single question that Kathryn won’t discuss any current legal things, I was still hoping for more than that! 

Highlight of this episode: 
Kathryn saying that she made the necklace she is wearing and implying that making and selling such necklaces will be a future endeavor of hers.
I meannnnnn I just can’t. 


The most disappointing out of all of this is why can’t people just learn to shut their mouths and let the person that is crazier than them BE crazier than they are? Landon just HAS to keep harping and talking and being defensive.  Landon looks like such a fool in all of this, and not just because of those damn earrings.  Just sit on your separate couch and let Kathryn eye roll herself into her own mess without you getting involved in all of it! 


The dates on the pregnancy test and Kathryn acting like she wasn’t pregnant at that time and then saying Oh, well, I didn’t know what I was going to do…. I can’t even comment.  This girl.  Seriously. 

I would watch an entire season of this show all over again (and I will) just to see Kathryns facial expressions because they kill me.  And now that I’ve typed that, I’m thinking I should re-watch season 1 and 2 reunions just for that very reason.  Hashtag Sunday Funday. 

Jennifer comes out and is crying over being blamed for T-Rav and Kathryn’s relationship and kathryn’s making those faces sitting there.  It’s like she doesn’t know how to turn it off – Kathryn, this one is supposed to be your friend!  Quit it with the faces! 
Tthen I thought Kathryn was going to flip when Thomas handed crying Jennifer a hankie because she started to jump up from her spot laying back on the sofa with the face contortions again! 

Ooo! Another Highlight : 
editors note : I guess I enjoyed part II more than I thought…. I retract my first statements….. 
My-boyfriend-Andy-Cohen asks about all of the food from T-Rav’s Dinner Party from Hell.  I seriously loved this because I’ve thought about and written about that food far too many times and theres nothing I love more than someone else saying the crazy thoughts I’m thinking.  
Kathryn sits there with her legs widespread and her elbows on her knees like a total dude (and seriously Kathryn stop calling people dude!) so thank goodness she is wearing that hideous thing gone with the wind fabulous get-up because it would be a whole different show if she had a shorter dress on.  
Such a lady! 

My-boyfriend-Andy-Cohen is at his wits end by the end of all of this.
But WAIT what else happened that jekyll island night?? 
My-boyfriend-andy-cohen is saying “no i don’t i don’t want to know what happened ….”
but I do! I do! Please! 
I laughed so hard when my-boyfriend-andy-cohen is like literally no stop talking and says “I want to murder myself. Seriously I want to murder myself”…. all the hours upon hours of housewives reunions and this pushes him past his point.  It’s really saying something.  Well done Landon and Kathryn.  

Ok wait why isn’t Landon taking a glass and cheers’ing at the end with everyone?
seriously? just hold the glass if nothing else? 
I’m now so paranoid of reunion babies that I’m thinking “Did Thomas knock Landon up? And she’s not drinking?”
I need help…. or that drink that Landon won’t touch – I’ll take it. 

well…. as we discussed last week ( I think? ) they were already filming season 4 with Kathryn acting like a lunatic…. so as one season ends, I’ll distract myself with other trash and follow the twitter fights online until we finally get another season premiere! 

:: RHoNY :: 
My big question with Jules and her “coochie-coo” is WHY was she climbing through a window?? But for her it doesn’t seem so odd somehow….. 
and seriously at this point I WANT to see that picture on her cell phone of her va-hoo-haw
like….. what could possibly be going on down there??? 


I’m so intrigued

it’s like “don’t look at the car accident when you drive by!” – but somehow you HAVE to – and then you immediately regret it.
Thank Goodness she has Dorinda to talk to because poor thing is going through a hell of a lot during all this filming and I think none of them are even aware. 
The scene with the plastic surgeon this week just killed me – she is hilarious.  


Bethenny looks ridiculous with this red hair and jumpsuit for skinny girl. 

sorry this Coffee Talk involves NADA but next week more entertainment should be on the ol tube.

:: maze of the week :: 
to everyone in T Swift’s squad. 
 I mean….. I couldn’t have been more jealous of their 4th of July weekend 

:: jack hole of the week :: 
ABC + The Bachelorette.
This was the SECOND week of the season with no episode! Come on ABC! You can’t do this to us! 
You better machete up to us with Bachelor in Paradise big time……. 

I know Jorge won’t let me down. 

EDITORS NOTE : 
as always, ignore my own blatant grammatical errors whilst I make fun of others poor grammar during coffee talk on a weekly basis.  
#hypocrite  #sorryimnotsorry

I write these posts late at night while simultaneously watching Bravo, taking snapchats of my snoring husband, and making to do lists of everything I was supposed to do and didn’t do that day and likely won’t do the next day either.  or the day after that.



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by TheSarcasticBlonde 
home, home inspiration, house, Lifestyle

:: low expectations ::

July 7, 2016

:: low expectations ::
I’m out for another sure to be disappointing day of house hunting,
and will have some Coffee Talk gossip for you tomorrow!

It still amazes me how photos and listings can look like one thing, and when you arrive somewhere it’s completely not what you expected.
I decided to prepare for another day in the car getting car sick from staring at my phone and directions and pics and stats, by looking at celebrity homes for about 2 hours last night.  You know…. to help keep my expectations low 🙂 

a few inspirational homes for you below! 

Anderson Cooper’s Brazil Vacation Home 

Bette Midler’s Pool House 
we’re really hoping to find something like this today….. fingers crossed…..

or if that’s not your thing,
Bette Midler’s Manhattan Home
because seriously this one is insane



Tyra Banks Beverly Hills Pad 
I’m sure we’ll get ceiling height just like this…… 


Taylor Swift’s 38K per month Rental in NYC while she renovates 

because she is renovating the 20 million Tribeca home



Cher’s Mega Mansion 
I really want to make a cheesy “Do you believeeeeee in _something about her house_ ?” comment but I’ll refrain…… 


Tom & Gisele’s California Home

 



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by TheSarcasticBlonde 
fashion, Lifestyle

:: wish list wednesday ::

July 6, 2016

:: wish list wednesday ::
lusts for the week……. 
  
my sister and I are in the process of stealing my moms style.
she got this j.crew dress last week and when we saw it we both loved it so one of us is on its way as well! 
they keep selling out of sizes and then having them re-stocked, sometimes the same day.
(yesterday they were out of S M and L and then all were back in stock when I was getting ready to write this post!) So check back even if it says your size is gone! 
it runs big so you can likely size down! 
{ J Crew Gingham Dress } 

Yesterday my girls Hoda and Kathy-Lee informed me that this week is the anniversary of the Bikini! So I thought I’d share some swimwear sales. 
for the mara hoffman lovers, lots of bikini tops and bottoms on sale HERE



both of these cover ups are on sale as well ! 

{ short lace cover up }   //  { maxi pom detail coverup } love the back on this one too! 

Coincidentally with Bikini Anniversary, 
 Target is doing 2 for $25 with their mix and match bikinis! 
I picked up these Target bikini bottoms last week for under $15 and absolutely love them. They are a VERY flattering cut too!  I didn’t like the top that matches them but they look great with my other solid bikini tops. 

{ target bikini bottoms } 
runs TTS or slightly big – I wear a S or M depending on the bottom and in these I am a S 

I love this inexpensive look-alike for much more expensive tops I’ve seen 
{ trim triangle bikini } 

I love the back on this dress and this print makes me want to go to the beach ASAP!  
{ racerback dress } 
and on sale for under $75 


for brunch one day over the 4th I wore my red open back tank with my favorite white skinny jeans. 

the tank comes in other colors, but they also have tee-sleeve version in other too. I like this navy best and it’ currently 50% off. 



{ navy open back tee } 


{ tie-shoulder dress } 



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by TheSarcasticBlonde 
Lifestyle, recipe

:: crack of the week : Ina’s Potato Salad ::

July 5, 2016

:: crack of the week : Ina’s Potato Salad ::
hope you all had a great long weekend celebrating the 4th! 
I’ll share some pics from our weekend later this week, but wanted to pop in to share this yummy potato salad recipe that I made for our family BBQ last night.

 have you missed my food photography!? I know you must have! 
I forgot to take an after photo so I just pulled some leftovers out 
and took this while I made breakfast 🙂 



I obviously went straight to my girl Ina for a recipe since she can do no wrong.  This recipe is simple but it originally called for Dill.  The store was completely out of fresh dill, and dill isn’t my favorite in potato salads anyway, so when I looked at her other recipes and saw she used parsley in some I decided to use some of that instead.  But of course, feel free to use the dill if you are a dill lover! 

Everyone in my family loved this and said it didn’t need anything else – including my brother in law who said he hates potato salad.  It really is a perfect potato salad recipe to please everyone because it has a lot of flavor but nothing is overpowering – it was a perfect side to go with our steaks and chicken.  It makes a very large batch and I know the leftovers today will be even better! 

:: Ina Garten’s Potato Salad :: 

recipe via food network 

:: Ingredients :: 

3 pounds small white potatoes**
 **I used 2 lb white 1 lb red for some extra color


Kosher salt


1 cup mayonnaise

1/4 cup buttermilk

2 tablespoons Dijon mustard

2 tablespoons whole-grain mustard

1/2 cup chopped fresh dill  **I omitted + used parsley instead 

Freshly ground black pepper

1/2 cup chopped celery

1/2 cup chopped red onion


:: Directions :: 



Place the potatoes and 2 tablespoons of salt in a large pot of water. Bring the water to a boil, then lower the heat and simmer for 10 to 15 minutes, until the potatoes are barely tender when pierced with a knife. Drain the potatoes in a colander, then place the colander with the potatoes over the empty pot and cover with a clean, dry kitchen towel. Allow the potatoes to steam for 15 to 20 minutes.

Meanwhile, in a small bowl, whisk together the mayonnaise, buttermilk, Dijon mustard, whole grain mustard, dill, 1 teaspoon of salt, and 1 teaspoon of pepper. Set aside.


When the potatoes are cool enough to handle, cut them in quarters or in half, depending on their size. Place the cut potatoes in a large bowl. While the potatoes are still warm, pour enough dressing over them to moisten. Add the celery and red onion, 2 teaspoons of salt and 1 teaspoon of pepper. Toss well, cover, and refrigerate for a few hours to allow the flavors to blend. Serve cold or at room temperature.



you can also try her Herb Potato Salad  and her French Potato Salad 


by TheSarcasticBlonde 
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Hi. I’m Taylor

A Southern girl turned Chicago transplant, recently settling back down in Atlanta. Fluent in sarcasm. Devout Bravo-holic and TV addict. Balances fitness with french fries. Penchant for Prosecco and Pinot Grigio. Wannabe Ina Garten in the kitchen. Online shopping enthusiast. Lover of fashion and decor.

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