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The Sarcastic Blonde

fashion, food, fitness + a dose of sarcastic gossip

Lifestyle, weekend recap

weekend happenings

October 27, 2014

weekend happenings
   
that gif has nothing to do with anything I just think it is HILARIOUS. 

hope you all had a wonderful weekend! 
it was absolutely gorgeous in chicago. 
I treated myself to a mani pedi on Friday afternoon…..
it took FOREVER, which would have been fine, except my dumb ass picked out a color that ended up looking like this.
you see that? see ?? oh you don’t see anything ?? yeah ME EITHER. 
I swear I thought I read some cute adorable nail polish name like “mademoiselle” or “starter wife” but I guess it said YOUR NAIL COLOR or WASTE OF TIME and I must have read it wrong. 
(see… this is why I do the same thing over and over, because when I try to “spice it up” and do something CAH-razy like change my nail polish choice, this is what I end up with.)

we had our final wedding of the year this weekend.
I am crazy wedding obsessed, but I’ll be ok with the break for a bit, especially for the sake of our bank accounts. 
our uberX driver to the church had an air freshener of his face.
um.  amazing. 
new goal :: turn my face into an air freshener and hand it out to all my friends to hang in their car.
update: my dumbass has been told this is breaking bad guy.
in my defense, then the uber driver literally is trying to be him because they were twins
#blondemoment

I wore a Parker dress I got a few months ago and have been so excited to wear.
it will definitely be one I’ll be able to wear over and over again and dress up with different accessories.
// parker laser cut leather serene dress //
fun fact…. i almost walked into the church with my dress still unzipped.
husbands are real perceptive and helpful at noticing things like your wifes dress being unzipped at the house, on the walk to the street, in the cab, etc. 

since it was so warm out, I broke out the more summery accessories (oops. my bad. is end of october too late for bright pink and florals? sorry I’m not sorry.) 

gigi new york monogrammed clutch // kate spade heels 

my beautiful rehearsal dinner shoes were even more uncomfortable than the first time I wore them 🙂 it was lovely. 

// j.crew factory necklace //
(scored it last week for $20 with their sale codes!) 
between the ceremony and reception we went to my in-laws for some cheese, wine, and flu shots. 
mother-in-law + daughter bonding at its finest. 

in addition to the shots, we met kips parents new puppy pearl.

don’t you just want to eat her?

I nursed my hangover yesterday by eating my body weight in food.
we went out for brunch, and upon returning, I immediately made brunch round II.
after pizza, ramen, and chicken wings, 
we made tacos for dinner and I created what I think is my best food photography to date.
 I MEANNNNNNNNNN 

you know how crappy my food photography is…… sooooo you should be impressed.
I’ll post my yummy doughnut recipe tomorrow! 


by TheSarcasticBlonde 
house, Lifestyle, weekend recap

movin’ on up

September 23, 2014

movin’ on up
we have unofficially-officially made the move to our new home.
we still have our apartment with some last minute things to clean out this next week,
but we are slowly settling in to the new abode.

I came home Saturday night from one of my best friends weddings at 
2 am to see a strange home awkwardly filled with our furniture.

It was strange.  But fun.  

But here’s the thing.
This new place……it’s a condo, but it has more of the layout of a townhouse, meaning it has STAIRS.  
You non city folk won’t understand this….. but I never realized I had become unprepared for stairs.  And I’ve only lived here for 2 days. 
It has a main floor with the kitchen and living room, and then downstairs has another living space and laundry with the patio, and upstairs on the second floor are the two bedrooms.
Sooooo its 3 stories.  2 sets of stairs.

I had been so excited for multiple levels and stairs. “STAIRS!!!!! YAY!!!” I thought.
I was wrong.
I have never realized I was a spoiled brat for only having to walk two feet to my bedroom for the last 5 years to get whatever I needed.
In a span of one hour, I go up and down and up and down and then UP and UP when going from the bottom floor.  
I AM EXHAUSTED.

Tell me non-city people who have homes and not condos/rich folk who have homes in Chicago/suburban people/normal people who are used to stairs…….. how do I navigate this stair thing?? 
Because I’m the kind of person that walks into a room, has no idea why I walked in there, walks back to the kitchen, remembers, walks back to the room, gets distracted by some other shiny object, goes back to the kitchen, realizes I never got what I needed ……. 
it’s a vicious cycle. 
and the only solution I can think of is this : 

I better have the ass of a supermodel by next week for how many stairs Im climbing.

seriously who makes these meme’s + gifs because I need to be their best friend. 

Here are some pics from the previous owners when the place was listed….. I’ll share updates 
when I climb out from under a pile of boxes 
after I have Kip install the stair climber seat
as they come.  

main floor  

 downstairs 
they left the leather couch and flat screen downstairs ….. kip and I have each been trying to claim it as our space. 
 upstairs 
memes/gifs :: image one two three




by TheSarcasticBlonde 
Lifestyle, weekend recap

labor day weekend

September 1, 2014

labor day weekend
long weekends are simply the greatest thing ever. 
it called for rain almost all weekend, and all weekend has been practically perfect.

we had a party at our place friday night, 
and the rain held out so we were able to spend the majority of it outside on the deck. 

 I’ve been buying these flowers at TJ’s every week. 

I made a few of my favorite things, so I’ll share the recipes tomorrow. 

the beginning of my go-to cake 
 I used my only bundt pant for my cake, so instead of making my appetizer in my usual ring, I improvised and used my mini bundt pans and did 6 individual cheese rings.  
#professionalfoodphotography

Saturday was relaxing, and we capped it off with dinner at a new-to-us restaurant walking distance for us called Bistro Dre.  It was a gorgeous night, and we luckily scored an outdoor table. 
The food was delicious. It is family style and arrives as it is ready.  We shared french onion soup, mac + cheese, and a caprese salad.  We were planning on sharing the fried chicken as a main course, but were so full we could barely move.  The portions are HUGE.  We will definitely be back;  the menu has a ton of things we can’t wait to try.  
I wore as much white over the weekend as I could, 
even though I don’t technically follow that rule. 
j.crew dress (old) // target booties // kendra scott earrings (15% off everything today!)

Sunday my friend took me to the Luke Bryan concert at Soldier Field, with Dierks Bentley and Lee Brice opening.  We had incredible seats on the floor and perfect weather. 


 Before Luke Bryan had even gone onstage, the beer vendors had ran out of beer and scrambled to get more, 
in the end only being able to get their hands on Blue Moon. 
see what happens when I go places? 

 The guy said they went through 3x the amount they go through at Bears games before Luke Bryan even started…… PREACH. 
 I love people at country concerts.  So fun.  

There’s so much great TV on tonight my DVR is exploding. 
Bachelor in Paradise, OC Reunion part 2, Jersey Belle, The Unauthorized Saved by The Bell Story.  
will you be watching the saved by the bell show? or am I alone in this? 





by TheSarcasticBlonde 
Lifestyle, weekend recap

weekend recap :: boston

August 18, 2014

weekend recap :: boston
we were in Boston for the weekend (our first time!) for my brother’s local wedding party (they married in April in St. John), and we had the most amazing time. 
I truly, truly fell in love with Boston.  I could not believe how incredibly beautiful it was!! 

we don’t have any pictures from our first night there, but we went to dinner at bricco and loved it and also loved the north end.  the next day we walked for about four hours before driving with family friends to duxbury for the party.  it was a quick but wonderful weekend. 

old navy chambray shirt (similar)// j.crew factory striped silk tank  (i love and live in this tank)//
  blank denim white jeans  (also love these distressed white jeans)



I wore this dress from Anthropologie, it is the most comfortable maxi ever. 
// navy ikat dress // 

 I almost wore this silk printed maxi, also from Anthropolgie, that I brought as back up. 
 I love it and will likely wear it to next weekends wedding.  
(5 more wedding celebrations to go during the year of the weddings!)


by TheSarcasticBlonde 
Lifestyle, weekend recap

weekend recap

July 28, 2014

weekend recap
I was home this weekend for my nephew’s baptism and it was so great to be home and spend so much time with him.
   
prior to having a nephew, I never had a crazy interest in baby photos and didn’t understand 
why every. single. thing. is fascinating.  
I was like :: I get it, babies are cute, especially your own baby/niece/nephew, but no one thinks they are as cute as you do.  
but now it’s time for me to be a hypocrite : look how cute my nephew is!! 
soooooo feel free to skip this post, but I want to eat him with a spoon and don’t get to see him that often so look at how cute he is and DEAL WITH IT. 

no but seriously, he is an angel.
and he is totally related to me. 
he loves shoes, especially tory burch, and can’t wait until he can get his hands on some pinot grigio. 
oooooo. wine.  ooooo shoes. 
excellent taste already. 

  I had arranged the flowers nicely, with a hidden crap load of tape to keep them in position, but alas, they broke free.  Martha Fail.

 he was a total gentleman the entire time at church,
and saved his throw up for me when we got home.
but he was still super polite, he only got it down my arms and missed my dress.  
wasn’t that so thoughtful of him?  I know, right!!! 
I did my first feeding of actual baby food and you would have thought it was the most exciting thing to ever happen to me in my life because of how entertained I was. 
 And we had lots of downtime to wear sunglasses and do some serious people watching at dinner.  He was passing lots of judgement behind those shades.  
“what are you looking at??”

in other news, we had dinner at a place with 
fried goat cheese balls.
um…… amazing. like my foot photography.

this was post was just mind blowing entertaining. 


by TheSarcasticBlonde 
Lifestyle, weekend recap

weekend recap

July 21, 2014

weekend recap
hope you had a great weekend
I am seriously hurting over here…… I hate Mondays 


I had a friends bridal shower…..



saw blake shelton at wrigley field in one of the rooftops

and the house hunting continues…..
some of the places are definitely NOT as pictured or described in the listing 🙂
strange and hideous art installations,  interesting ceiling fans, bright blue bathroom
annnnnnd weird lighting throughout the place, everywhere, even next to the toilets.
I mean…. who picks these things out? 


so random, but this recording of a Comcast customer trying to cancel service is HILARIOUS.  listened to the whole thing.  seriously the worst customer service in the world.

I’m greatly looking forward to the finale of RHONY.



finally, the leg hurling across the room scene!! FINALLY!!!!!


by TheSarcasticBlonde 
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Hi. I’m Taylor

A Southern girl turned Chicago transplant, recently settling back down in Atlanta. Fluent in sarcasm. Devout Bravo-holic and TV addict. Balances fitness with french fries. Penchant for Prosecco and Pinot Grigio. Wannabe Ina Garten in the kitchen. Online shopping enthusiast. Lover of fashion and decor.

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