TheSarcasticBlonde, Author at The Sarcastic Blonde

Lifestyle

:: things to make you smile ::

March 3, 2015

random things for tuesday :

bravo released the trailer for Real Housewives of New York

and DAMN GIRL it looks nuts. (if it isn’t showing up see video here)

I can’t waaaaaait.

oprah seemingly running away from gaga (gif)

this video series cracks me up and it is SO TRUE (find more videos here)

this is so cute

the women tell all last night was highly disappointing.

it was as exciting as farmer chris and his hometown.

Lifestyle, weekend recap

:: weekend recap ::

March 2, 2015

I hope you all had a wonderful weekend 🙂

I was home meeting my best friends baby boy for the first time and spending time with my family and nephew.

It’s so crazy to think my best friend of my whole life has A BABY! Her whole family and my whole family got together Friday night and it was so nice to spend the weekend with them.

He is just the sweetest thing ever. Such a little angel.

My sister made some serious upgrades to their guest room and they are too cute not to share.

She had our framed wedding photo on the nightstand, new issues of magazines, bottled water, granola bars, and cookies in mason jars all nestled in the nightstand.

THE CUTEST.

I’ve been meaning to post about these leggings because I had been living in them.

I wore them every single day this weekend and one them so much.

They are Yummie (RHONYC heather’s line…. I thought it was called yummy tummy but online it just says yummie) and have a higher waist to suck in and smooth out the stomach and they are so damn comfortable.

I love them with my 5050 boots and a tunic top or oversized sweater.

gingham top // boots // leggings

(I snagged the blue gingham top after I posted it of a wishlist wednesday and love it so much!!

there are other sizes for gingham top available here if they don’t have yours)

these jessica simpson boots are almost identical and are crazy inexpensive, under $100!

// boots //

we stopped by the ballard designs outlet over the weekend but didn’t find anything to take with us.

I am determined to get a coffee table and rug for our living room this next week or two (we have our old coffee table in the basement living room and our old rug is way too big for the space).

There are a couple rugs I’m debating at the moment.

// rug //

in case you can’t tell, yes, I am all over the place with what kind of rug.

with 17 days until Vegas,

I am hoping to get serious with the healthy eating and working out this week.

this is the laziest I have been in years and the fit of my clothes is showing it!

time to get back on track!

image

this week, I’ll be following the Tone It Up weekly workout schedule and trying to reduce my carb cravings 🙂

I’m also going to try to squeeze in at least ten minutes of abs a night,

these 8 minute ab videos are straight out of the 80s, but easy and effective.
and a good laugh staring at the workout clothes.

Lifestyle

I’m sorry. I can’t. Don’t Hate Me.

February 26, 2015

I’m sorry. I can’t. Don’t Hate Me.

if you read the title of this post and immediately recognized it as the

Post It Note break up on Sex and The City, I love you.

I’m way off my blogging-A-game this week.

I have all of my chicken scratch notes ready to transform into coffee talk,

buuuuuuuuuut

I’m sorry and I can’t and don’t hate me.

a friend was in town last minute for work (so I HAD to go out last night for DRINKS. HAD TO.) and now I am feeling like a 45 year old that thought she could have a couple of glasses and not feel the affects the next day while I try to pack for a trip home to see my family, nephew, and meet my best friends new one month old addition (EEEEE!!!!!!) straight from work tomorrow night.

basically. I chose sweatpants and passing out tonight and wine with girlfriends last night.

to be honest, I’m shocked I chose my girlfriendsover my sweatpants last night.

the great news is there is a winter storm in the south right when I was really in dire need of some warmth and outdoor time.

the even sadder, more amazing news is that their bitter cold will still feel like springtime to me.

#itsthelittlethings

follow along on instagram for likely pictures of me munching babies this weekend ~~and me wondering when I stopped being afraid of babies and instead wanted to eat them up.~~

or pictures displaying my love of mcdonald’s airport food.

i’ll be counting the seconds until work ends, won’t even be annoyed by the nasty people jammed on the train en route to the airport, and don’t even mind a flight that lands at midnight………

as long as I can get my hands on some McD’s before hopping on the plane. preach.

book club, friday randoms, Lifestyle

:: book club + things ::

February 24, 2015

I have some random little things for today.

as opposed to days when I have completely organized, planned, and thoughtful posts?

I didn’t work on any posts this weekend, not even late Sunday night like usual, because I was knee deep in The Girl on The Train.

ps if your pottery barn has this blanket, I am so serious it is the greatest thing to ever happen to us.

~~I’m thiiiiiis close to finishing it but am trying to not stay up late at night,~~

~~but I’ll be finished tonight or tomorrow!~~
moring edit : I stayed up way past bedtime and finished! so many twists and turns – I couldnt stop reading! really liked it!

I highly recommend it. Easy and quick read (but still not my gone girl….. but a great book nonetheless!) All of my friends that have read it highly recommend it as well!

As I’ve said before on the blog, Liane Moriarty is one of my favorite authors. Since I had read all of her newer books (What Alice Forgot, The Husbands Secret, Big Little Lies) I decided to try one of her older, earlier books. The Last Anniversary was what I chose.

It was okay; an easy, light hearted read.

However, I LOVED the latest 3 of her books and this one paled in comparison.

She has definitely become a better write since.

I’d say skip it, but definitely read the other three 100%!

I never commented on Andy Cohens second book, The Andy Cohen Diaries, but I loved it of course.

Obviously. I want him to write one of these every year!!

When I was at dinner with my girlfriends last week somehow this Olay In Shower Body Lotion came up (who knows how, you know how it goes). I ordered it on the spot on my Amazon Prime app (I really need to delete the app…. its way too easy and my obsession with Amazon runs deep).

anyyyyyyyways, IT IS AMAZING. My skin is so dry right now with the Chicago winter, and nothing is worse than getting out of the hot shower and freezing your buns off while putting lotion on. This stuff is SO GREAT.

The girl scout cookies I ordered from my coworkers daughter arrived.

Amazing and DANGEROUS.

I’m trying to focus on Vegas vacay in a month and limit my intake to just one after dinner………

speaking of trying to limit my intake,

just when you are feeling better about yourself from December’s Victorias Secret Lingerie Show,

BAM they surprise you with a Swim Special that will be airing this Thursday on CBS.

~~thanks obama.~~

so those girl scout cookies will either be eaten immediately as I eat my emotions watching, or it’ll motivate me to not eat them.

errrrrr, I think we all know which way this will go.

I wore one of my new favorite items of clothing for girls dinner:

my ~~sassy pants~~ black leather leggings.

under $100, stretchy, great subtle pockets that did great things for my butt if I do say so myself.

you can’t even really tell the leather in the pic, but hopefully the real ones do it better justice. they are AMAZING.

// LEATHER LEGGINGS //

also, the only pro to seriously freezing cold is getting to wear my faux fur snood.

I almost slept in it after I got home….. almost….

~~but I didn’t want to get the crumbs from the girl scout cookies in it so I took it off like a lady.~~

// nordstrom (old), identical in different color //

in the opposite, warm weathered direction,

when Piperlime was having a sale, I snagged the tank that matched the romper that I had loved.

the low back is so cute, and the straps are adjustable so it fits perfectly.

// EIGHT SIXTY CAMI //

I’m excited to wear it with white jeans

~~IF IT EVER EVEN REACHES 50 DEGREES.~~

is it friday yet ???

Lifestyle

:: oscar sunday ::

February 22, 2015

I know you’ll all be watching the red carpet and the oscars tonight!

thought that this graphic of all of the dresses worn by the best actress winners was too cute

can’t wait to see what everyone wears tonight!!

via

friday randoms, Lifestyle

:: friday things ::

February 20, 2015

image ; follow along on pinterest !

1. an amazing post :: how to do anything (warning : this will lead to you being on your computer reading posts forever if you’re anything like me).

2. the gorgeous girl samantha that never talked (that we saw) on the bachelor is dating jeremy piven. um…. touche lady. well played. farmer chris or jeremy piven? tough call.

3. i’m about 3 weeks late seeing this, but jeff lewis sold his beloved gramercy and theres a full set of pics here. flipping out needs a new season to start ASAP. i miss him.

4. this chambray shirtdress is the cutest thing I’ve ever seen at a perfect price

5. one of my new favorite youtube workout channels (love my at home workouts) is LoveSweatFitness. she just posted a 15 minute barre workout I’ll be trying out today!

6. I’ve been lusting after suede over the knee boots for months, especially this pair I always see on the adorable Southern Curls and Pearls. So happy to have found this gorgeous pair for a reasonable price. My mom told me if I bought another pair of boots ever I was insane….. I may be becoming a boot hoarder. But in Chicago our shoe options are limited for 9 months out of the year so we need them!!

7. ivanka trump red dress on finale of Celebrity Apprentice was amaze. she is always so great to stare at.

8. How Sweet Eats is one of my favorite food bloggers. (also, her non-food related ramblings about tv and nonsense on her “tuesday crumbs” are my favorite!) I could eat this BLT Chopped salad with corn, feta, and avocado all day erry-day.

9. don’t forget to check out this weeks coffee talk and the recipe for the best chocolate cake ever. like, taylor swift ever ever ever.

10. i’m so cold I could cry. in case ya didn’t guess.