Coffee Talk: Mini-Tukey-Day Edition

Wednesday, November 21, 2012

discuss amongst ya-selves....

shall we start with The Real Housewives this week? 
me, watching, judging, and loving every minute minute of it
p.s. this is totally the new gif-intro to all housewives gossip 

do you think kim's daugher's boyfriend was excited enough for prom? 
he was sweating like a whore in church.
calm down.... and keep in your pants until after the dance buddy.... 
kim also seemed like she's still popping crazy pills
which excited me greatly.
that chicken salad, however, 
with hands ALL OVER IT, did not. 

I have a new goal in life:
live like yolanda. 
I want to have a tight bod, wear lululemon all day, act like martha and pick flowers and cook and decorate an insanely gorgeous house
and mostly: I want her damn fridge. 
i'll just live in her fridge quit honestly. 
 I'm pretty sure it's the size of my apartment. 

I couldn't quite figure out if during the piano party
{which, side note: the transition to sitting and staring at the piano was quite awkward and seemed like a strange happening... I'm with Taylor,
when in doubt, chug your wine}. 
anyways... I couldn't figure out during the whole soiree if Mr. David Foster is highly sarcastic or a giant dick.
I'm leaning towards pompous ass..... 
on another note, 
we get it. you love eachother.  lay off.
and this is your 3rd wife? ..... 4th? 
exactly.  quit toasting each other and making out at the table.

Mama Elsa steals the show in Miami once again.
turns out plastic surgery can eff with your brain to.
how does one not realize that a 7 foot tall person with man hands and an adams apple face isn't a lady ? 
I mean.... it's not exactly trickery. 
this lady however, is doing quite a good job. 
coulda fooled me. 
oddly enough, this quote can also refer to mama's botched plastic surgery.
not only did she win with that quote,
she also said simmer down all throughout the dinner from hell. 
which is possibly one of my favorite terms ever. 
the dinner party was an absolutely disaster,
and thomas kramer is an asshole
{he and mr. foster should have a dinner party together?!}
but thank GOD there was a pole to diffuse the tension. 

Miley decided to embrace the Thanksgiving holiday spirit
by going even more bald to resemble a raw turkey.
keep up the good work, miley.  
I don't know what I'd talk about here without you. 

if I weren't in love with Mr. Tatum enough,
Glamour posted his 8 relationship lessons.
send your boyfriends the link ladies.... we eat this stuff up. 
Jenna is a lucky lady. 

and finally,
the crack known as Homeland (eee!!!)
We all know I watch more TV than anyone and I have no life, so I am somewhat of an authority on this stuff, and I think I speak for everyone and their mom when I say it's the best television show ever.

Enjoy this SNL skit.  
It is just as perfect as the show, but actually funny.  

Happy Thanksgiving tomorrow :) 
I'll be back when I recover from my food coma. 



  1. No way is Kim Richards sober. Lady has ISSUES.

    Mama Elsa needs a spin-off show, like yesterday.

  2. hahahaha I was dying watching Kim make chicken salad. I wish she'd just get her own show quite frankly

    x Kelsey

  3. O...M...G, Miley Cyrus!! Scary! Hope you had a great Thanksgiving!!

  4. ahh i NEED to see homeland. haha omg and mama elsa standing up to that dude was amazing. he was so self-righteous!